I don’t know about you but for many years I asked this question….. not out loud but in my mind….I was raised to know God and know that he exists but still I sometimes wondered if it was really true.
I, myself, have never seen God, nor have I ever actually ‘heard’ his voice. I have never experienced a ‘flash of light’ or had an ‘out of body’ experience thus the doubt….
Not to say that I did not believe there is a God, I do and always have but there were times where I wondered if he was truly ‘there’….. And did he really hear my prayers? How was I supposed to know?? Where were the signs?? It was in these moments that I found myself in some very dark places in my life…. And my faith was very weak.
It was also during these times that God was working for me the most without my even knowing it. Though I was struggling within, God always was providing for all my needs. Just when I was struggling the most God put people in my path who helped me get through my struggles. He placed special people in my path who reminded me that God was with me and he never left me.
One such person was a person I was very close to, Denise. My brother used to call me Denise because we were so much alike in more ways than one, but something about her was different when we met up again….she was more peaceful and more content than I had ever seen her before. She reminded me all the time that God was with me. When I was struggling physically at work she actually prayed over me more than once. She had no idea what this meant to me because I never told her. Between her and Jose I came back to God without even realizing that I had walked away. I believe that God put her in my path for this very reason. This was my ‘sign’ from God that I needed to trust him again and stop trying to do ‘life’ by myself.
So even though I never had any of the wondrous, flashy, or out of the ordinary experiences that some may have had, I definitely had my ‘moments with God’ and the ‘sign’ I had been looking for…..there were there the whole time….I just wasn’t aware of them….but because of that everything has changed….Now I see God in everything around me….
I see God in ways that I took for granted and passed off as just a ‘good feeling’ or a close call. I know that God is always there for me because every time I go out of my comfort zone I can feel his presence, calming me and filling me with peace and contentment.
Knowing God is always there is not something I can actually “show” you…..it’s not something I can let you hear…..it’s really not something I can actually explain with words…..it just is….
The only way I can say I know God is there and hears me is by telling you what I feel and know in my heart. God guides me every day, not with written agendas or texts or phone calls but within my heart and mind.
Every morning I wake up and the first thing that comes to my mind is “Thank you God for another day…..what are your plans for me today?”
My only wish is for everyone to experience this peace and contentment that I feel today and even on the ‘bad’ days. Because no matter how bad I may feel or how difficult things may be I know that God is right there beside me…..no matter what…
Sorry for the random rambling of this blog, but it is what it is….Peace be with you….and know always, GOD is really there ALWAYS!!
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